There’s a saying in parenthood: the days are long, but the years are short. And man, have I been experiencing those long days recently. My cup is just simply empty by 5:30pm every day. Its been such a challenge. I just have to give give give of myself all day (to everyone: spouse, kids, students, house, classwork, dog). And I haven’t figured out a way to “put my oxygen mask on first” that actually consistently works for me.
I have so many things going on. I’ve got at least 3 to-do lists running at all times (teaching stuff, master’s school work, house work). Just those three alone are enough to drown a person. I’m also running a half-marathon in little over a month. And I’m trying to be a good wife and mother, while not losing my mind every time I have to scrub the kitchen counters or table because of a new mystery sticky substance. And then there’s the dog, who has been purposely messing in the house and getting on the table to get food (probably because he doesn’t get enough attention and is asking for it in all the wrong ways). Plus the constant cycle of diapers to wash and dry and put away, which is required because of the balancing of the family budget. And the fact that Jordan’s been gone for part or all of the weekend for 4 of the 5 last weekends. And now football has begun.
I am just plain overwhelmed. I won’t allow myself to ask for or accept babysitting help from our families because I feel like I “use up” all of that time during the week already.
Suffice to say that I’m trying to go through my old “I’m so blessed” blog posts and remember the very happy times. This is just a season. Just a season. Just a season.
It’s easy to lose sight of that. Very easy. Even scrolling through my iPhone photos and looking at pictures of my babies from a couple months ago reminds me that this time is precious. But man I can’t see the forest for the trees right now.
This stuff is hard!